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Vanilla's guide to being scary!


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Do your stats look like this?
 
-----------
STATS----------
Intimidation - 
0
Seriousness - 0
Scariness - 0
-----------------------------
Overall - 
0
-----------------------------
Results - 
Not Scary
 
Let's change that.
 
These are the best tips to increase your intimidation, seriousness and most importantly, scariness.
 
1) Walk around everywhere (Don't be in a rush! Walking around will make you look special, important and intimidating! This will score you +2 intimidation points)
 
2) Don't at ease people (Don't at ease people! This will make it look like you deserve all the salutes you get. At easing is a sign of weakness and happiness. We are not here to do that! You will get +1 seriousness points)
 
3) Have a deep voice (Deep voices are key! If someone is doing something wrong and you talk to them with that juicy voice box they will immediately shape up! This will get you +3 intimidation points)
 
4) Have a monotone voice (Show no emotion, show no fear! Having a monotone voice means you cannot be disturbed! YOU ARE STRONG! From doing this, you will get +1 seriousness points)
 
5) Raise your voice when someone does something wrong (Now this, will scare the hell out of people! This will ensure that NO-ONE will make you angry again! If someone hears your beautiful deep, monotone voice and then you yeet them a BIG FAT ROAR this will definitely get them to shiver! This will give you +5 scariness points)
 
6) Do not minge (This is pretty obvious. If you minge, your not serious which will make you not scary. Not minging will give you a nice +3 seriousness points)
 
7) Use proper grammar and spelling in OOC, Comms and other types of chat form (nO seRIous aNd SCeRy pEople taLK LiKe Thiss! PROPER GRAMMAR AND SPELLING PEOPLE. DO IT! This will give you +2 seriousness points)
 
8) Stare at people (That's right. Just flat out stare at people. Just stare. Don't say a word, just continue staring. This tactic will give you +1 scariness points)
 
Now, let's look at your stats again.

 

-----------STATS----------
Intimidation - 
5
Seriousness - 7
Scariness - 6
-----------------------------
Overall - 
18
-----------------------------
Results - 
Very Scary


Now THAT's better!
 


Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed.

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/me uses sand 

-----------STATS----------
Intimidation - 
5100
Seriousness - 70000
Scariness - 6000
-----------------------------
Overall - 900000000000000000

-----------------------------
Results - Really fucking scary, like more than thrawn and moth 

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6 hours ago, Jesis said:

Jman uses the stare tactic on me all the time and it is very scary.

Just cough and make it sound like you have lung cancer, it helps break the silence. That's what I do and it ends up either getting him to actually speak or me dying, most of the time the first one though. 

Edited by Morgan
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  • 2 weeks later...

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